Since I get free text messages with my mobile phone tarrif, I use them a lot. I always have, easier to send someone a text message which they can look at when it’s convenient and reply to than phone them when they may be working or driving or dancing around naked.

I got a text message from mcphee earlier asking how often we texted each other because he’d had a larger bill than usual and the number of text messages to me were huge...so I checked mine. 616 texts for last month! I do get 500 free but that’s still 116 to pay for...blimey.

Naturally I blame mcphee, he was without a PC and t’internet last month and must have been annoying me with lots of his usual stupid questions